There is a song by Steven Curtis Chapman that says:
I can see the fingerprints of god
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of god
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of god
To join visit Beki at The Rusted Chain...
God's Fingerprint... well, it's these girls. His Fingerprints are all over them. In Josie and her old soul, her worry, her being such a big girl and such a little girl all at the same time...
And His Fingerprints are all over Sarah, the surprise baby that we didn't know how much we'd need. He sent her to save us, to pull us forward, to make us laugh, to give us strength. He made Sarah just for our family and we are so blessed by her...
Simply, we are blessed. By the three girls we have been given and the opportunity to welcome this fourth... just so incredibly blessed.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Running, watching radar, cooking far to much, and dessert...
We are nine days in to this harvest. So far the weather has been good and we have been in the field every day. There are storms west of here today and I am watching the radar and praying they stay west and pass beside us. We still have four fields to cut over by Nebraska, where the hail was bad. One of them is good, the other's all are dinged up a bit.
The girls and I have been living in the car. Last night I drove out to a field we simply call "29". It's up north, a half hour one way. There was no wheat on that field last year. The last time I drove those roads Marie was in the back in her car seat, bringing dinner out to the guys. Marie was mad that Josie got to ride in Daddy's pickup and she pitched the biggest temper tantrum on the way home. Marie was mad at me when we got home, mad at me all through her bath, and when her Daddy got home I told him he'd better deal with her. All she wanted was that Daddy.
I cried most of the way out to the field last night. Just remembering. God, I am so grateful I have so many memories of that child. Thinking of her doing things that I haven't remembered in awhile, it feels good. Driving that familiar road, it feels good. We all miss her so much.
Time doesn't ease that. I've learned to smile easier, and I've gotten used to carrying this cross of grief now. But still she's always in my mind, always right on the edge of my tongue. The coming of this new baby doesn't change any of that. In fact, in many ways I think Luke and I are feeling the ache of Marie's absence more now.
Today they are finishing up the little field on the west side of the county and moving east.
Today I mowed the lawn, ran Josie to gymnastics, baked.
Today Sarah pitched a fit wanting to wear her green dress again. It's too big but she wears it every other day anyway.
Today I'm praying for Abigail, that it doesn't rain, that baby is healthy. And I'm praising Him for all this business, this craziness, and this harvest.
Today my girls are fighting and I've got to be honest. It's a blessing, I love it. I love that they have each other, that Sarah gives Josie a run for her money, and I've dealt with this sibling fighting before when Marie and Josie did it. But I've just about had it. It is obnoxious. I'm over it and my patience is frayed.
I need to start dinner in about 20 minuets.
These are what we're having for dessert and they are amazing, and easy!
One Hundred Thousand Calorie Bars
The girls and I have been living in the car. Last night I drove out to a field we simply call "29". It's up north, a half hour one way. There was no wheat on that field last year. The last time I drove those roads Marie was in the back in her car seat, bringing dinner out to the guys. Marie was mad that Josie got to ride in Daddy's pickup and she pitched the biggest temper tantrum on the way home. Marie was mad at me when we got home, mad at me all through her bath, and when her Daddy got home I told him he'd better deal with her. All she wanted was that Daddy.
I cried most of the way out to the field last night. Just remembering. God, I am so grateful I have so many memories of that child. Thinking of her doing things that I haven't remembered in awhile, it feels good. Driving that familiar road, it feels good. We all miss her so much.
Time doesn't ease that. I've learned to smile easier, and I've gotten used to carrying this cross of grief now. But still she's always in my mind, always right on the edge of my tongue. The coming of this new baby doesn't change any of that. In fact, in many ways I think Luke and I are feeling the ache of Marie's absence more now.
Today they are finishing up the little field on the west side of the county and moving east.
Today I mowed the lawn, ran Josie to gymnastics, baked.
Today Sarah pitched a fit wanting to wear her green dress again. It's too big but she wears it every other day anyway.
Today I'm praying for Abigail, that it doesn't rain, that baby is healthy. And I'm praising Him for all this business, this craziness, and this harvest.
Today my girls are fighting and I've got to be honest. It's a blessing, I love it. I love that they have each other, that Sarah gives Josie a run for her money, and I've dealt with this sibling fighting before when Marie and Josie did it. But I've just about had it. It is obnoxious. I'm over it and my patience is frayed.
I need to start dinner in about 20 minuets.
These are what we're having for dessert and they are amazing, and easy!
One Hundred Thousand Calorie Bars
Friday, July 22, 2011
Fingerprint Friday...
There is a song by Steven Curtis Chapman that says:
I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God
To join visit Beki at The Rusted Chain.
This week has been busy. Everything has been focused on the harvest, feeding the guys, Josie going to a sleepover... In the midst of everything that goes on though there are always a few constants. God's love, the blessings He gives us, knowing that Marie walks with Jesus...
And for me, there's always Luke. And all of us girls are just crazy about him.
He's been in the sprayer from 5 am on and in the combine from about 10am to dark every day. He's been gone since long before they wake and he comes in the door when they make their way to bed later than usual. The girls haven't been able to see him unless we go to the field. I only get to be with him when we fall into bed at night and he is asleep before his head even hits the pillow.
This week, I am grateful for the man that God has blessed me with and how hard he works to take care of us.
And he's pretty cute...
And a really great Dad...
And he has this amazing faith...
And he lets each of us know that we're loved...
I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God
To join visit Beki at The Rusted Chain.
This week has been busy. Everything has been focused on the harvest, feeding the guys, Josie going to a sleepover... In the midst of everything that goes on though there are always a few constants. God's love, the blessings He gives us, knowing that Marie walks with Jesus...
And for me, there's always Luke. And all of us girls are just crazy about him.
He's been in the sprayer from 5 am on and in the combine from about 10am to dark every day. He's been gone since long before they wake and he comes in the door when they make their way to bed later than usual. The girls haven't been able to see him unless we go to the field. I only get to be with him when we fall into bed at night and he is asleep before his head even hits the pillow.
This week, I am grateful for the man that God has blessed me with and how hard he works to take care of us.
And he's pretty cute...
And a really great Dad...
And he has this amazing faith...
And he lets each of us know that we're loved...
I am proud to be his wife.
Labels:
farming,
Fingerprint Friday,
Josie's doings,
Marie,
photos,
sarah
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Harvest....
It's been a long time coming. Last September we drilled seeds into the dust. Trusting, hoping. And the winter was dry. No moisture came and there was worry. And spring brought her rains... and the hail came. Four quarters nearly destroyed. Acres and acres of could-have-been smashed into the earth by ice.
But it's here now. After heavy rains that would not stop, after prayers. After all that trusting it's here. We have a harvest. And God is good... all the time. I think even in the lean times there must be some lesson He's teaching there. For me the big one is TRUST... I'm getting there I hope.
But it's here now. After heavy rains that would not stop, after prayers. After all that trusting it's here. We have a harvest. And God is good... all the time. I think even in the lean times there must be some lesson He's teaching there. For me the big one is TRUST... I'm getting there I hope.
"As soon as the grain is ripe, he puts the sickle to it, because the harvest has come."
Mark 4:29 NIV
Monday, July 18, 2011
Prayer request...
Please pray for Abigail. She is going through a hard time right now and my heart just breaks for her. I wish there was more I could do but I know that prayer is powerful and it's what she needs most right now. If you are moved please leave her parents your words of support.
Lord- please bring Abigail comfort, please bring her parents peace and the ability to accept your will. Please guide the doctors and open their hearts to compassion. You have a perfect plan for your beautiful Abigail, and we trust in you. In Jesus name, Amen.
Lord- please bring Abigail comfort, please bring her parents peace and the ability to accept your will. Please guide the doctors and open their hearts to compassion. You have a perfect plan for your beautiful Abigail, and we trust in you. In Jesus name, Amen.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
A Labor of Love...
Last year, July heat beating down while we watched our kids swim in the inflatable pool in our backyard my friend Brooke asked me a question. "Would you help me" she said "get something going to redo the playground at the fairgrounds?". I agreed, thinking of the baked in the sun, splintered wonderland that my girls don't play on. Too old, too dangerous. And our county had just finished building a state of the art events center at the fairgrounds too. Such a bummer. It could be great place to play.
Fast forward a few weeks and Brooke and I are sitting in a golf cart waiting for the parade starting our county fair to begin. "We need something to make this project really special, to make it stand out", said Brooke. "You know" I said, my mind on Little Mama, "it would be really wonderful if that park could be universally accessible".
And it began. We worked fast. We applied for a Great Outdoors Colorado (GoCo) Grant the end of August. And we were turned down. Not enough community support they had said. Not surprising, we hadn't had much time to raise any. And stubborn farm wives don't give up. The team of four stay-home moms and the county commissioners had applied for other grants and we had received them. We worked hard, secured donations, raised support in the community, made pancakes, applied for some more grants. And we applied to GoCo again.
Then in June sitting in the sun on bleachers watching Josie play t-ball against the team from one town over. Another friend sits beside me and asks "did you find out yet, did you get the grant"? Huddled together over a smart phone as our kids battle it out on opposite teams we pull up the website to see if GoCo had made a decision... and they approved us! We received a $200,000 grant from Great Outdoors Colorado to build a universally accessible playground here in northeastern Colorado!
We are blessed to be able to put a facility like that here for children that don't have a lot of the fancy stuff you can find in the bigger cities. For kids who have a hard time playing on the parks that are here now. But soon, they will be able to play and be part of things, just like everyone else. And that fills my heart like you cannot believe!
Because I think back two years ago, carrying our Princess Marie at the city park. Daddy helping her through the parts that he could. Me sitting cross-legged, the metal floor of the play structure cutting in to my ankles. Holding her up and helping keep her hands on the wheel so that she could drive a pretend firetruck and we could see that smile... And she was just a kid for a little while, having fun at the playground and she wasn't different from the rest of them. She was happy, and that meant more than anything else. Watching Marie play just like any other kid... priceless. Watching her swing in her special swing at home, beside Josie, the two of them making memories. Priceless. My favorite memories are her playing.
And we will be able to share that with other kids. Because they're out here, in this farm town. In the other tiny towns surrounding us. Over in Nebraska, those kids are there. And soon they'll have a place to play and I am blessed to have gotten to be a part of that.
It's been my labor of love, in memory of our perfect Princess. My Little Mama, Daddy's Isabella. Our Rie Rie. If feels so good to still be able to do something good, in some sort of way, for her.
Fast forward a few weeks and Brooke and I are sitting in a golf cart waiting for the parade starting our county fair to begin. "We need something to make this project really special, to make it stand out", said Brooke. "You know" I said, my mind on Little Mama, "it would be really wonderful if that park could be universally accessible".
And it began. We worked fast. We applied for a Great Outdoors Colorado (GoCo) Grant the end of August. And we were turned down. Not enough community support they had said. Not surprising, we hadn't had much time to raise any. And stubborn farm wives don't give up. The team of four stay-home moms and the county commissioners had applied for other grants and we had received them. We worked hard, secured donations, raised support in the community, made pancakes, applied for some more grants. And we applied to GoCo again.
Then in June sitting in the sun on bleachers watching Josie play t-ball against the team from one town over. Another friend sits beside me and asks "did you find out yet, did you get the grant"? Huddled together over a smart phone as our kids battle it out on opposite teams we pull up the website to see if GoCo had made a decision... and they approved us! We received a $200,000 grant from Great Outdoors Colorado to build a universally accessible playground here in northeastern Colorado!
We are blessed to be able to put a facility like that here for children that don't have a lot of the fancy stuff you can find in the bigger cities. For kids who have a hard time playing on the parks that are here now. But soon, they will be able to play and be part of things, just like everyone else. And that fills my heart like you cannot believe!
Because I think back two years ago, carrying our Princess Marie at the city park. Daddy helping her through the parts that he could. Me sitting cross-legged, the metal floor of the play structure cutting in to my ankles. Holding her up and helping keep her hands on the wheel so that she could drive a pretend firetruck and we could see that smile... And she was just a kid for a little while, having fun at the playground and she wasn't different from the rest of them. She was happy, and that meant more than anything else. Watching Marie play just like any other kid... priceless. Watching her swing in her special swing at home, beside Josie, the two of them making memories. Priceless. My favorite memories are her playing.
And we will be able to share that with other kids. Because they're out here, in this farm town. In the other tiny towns surrounding us. Over in Nebraska, those kids are there. And soon they'll have a place to play and I am blessed to have gotten to be a part of that.
"I have yet to meet a child who isn't special and doesn't have needs...it's all just in varying degrees." Sandra Eller (mother of a child lost to Mitochondrial Disease)
It's been my labor of love, in memory of our perfect Princess. My Little Mama, Daddy's Isabella. Our Rie Rie. If feels so good to still be able to do something good, in some sort of way, for her.
Labels:
advocating,
day to day,
grief,
Marie,
Mitochondrial Disease awareness
Friday, July 01, 2011
There is a song by Steven Curtis Chapman that says:
I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God
I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God
This week the fingerprint was simple...
I saw God's hands in the same cotton dress, plaid on one side and flowered on the other. And that two sisters who were together only briefly can still wear the same dress... And from Josie, to Marie, to Sarah, that dress will pass down again. They're all tied together whether their bodies are together or not. Someday all of my girls will walk together in summer dresses up in Heaven. This week it did my heart so good to see Sarah and Marie wearing the same dress.
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