Of course I have many, many things to be grateful for this year... Sarah's here, my Josie is amazing, I have a wonderful husband, good family, amazing friends, Jesus,a beautiful home, a nice car, a (mostly) good dog... so much to be grateful for... I just can't get into it.
Because something happened this year. Something I never fully believed would happen. Something that I cannot get over...
I'm grateful. I know just where Rie Rie is. She's safe, warm, happy, loved... She's just waiting for me in God's big house and someday I'll go in the front door, pick her up, hug my Father and enjoy being home... Someday.
It just seems like a really long time from now. Three months gone this week, Thanksgiving this week, and I blow kisses to Heaven instead of placing them on the softest cheeks you've every felt, instead of kissing that little freckle on her forehead.
I have a lot to be grateful for, most of all the gift of Jesus' salvation. His conquering sin, death, and the devil. Our promise of life eternal and knowing someday "He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain..." Revelations 21:4. I really finally get it now. I understand.
There will be no more deathThe problem is someday isn't today. I miss my kid, I want her now... I have a lot to be thankful for but this year I'm just not feeling it. This year a bad dream came true. My sweet Marie isn't here, so our family isn't really together and we won't be until someday...
I don't like this. Not one little bit. Not at all.
7 comments:
I get it. I have been telling Monica that we will live the rest of our lives first, and then we will get to see Megan again. It seems so far away. If I live to be 70 or 80 that 40-50 years of waiting - so many lifetimes.
I hope you can enjoy being the family that is here this year. We are going to try to do the same.
I'll probably go out to the cemetery too. I know she's not there anymore, but I feel closer to her there.
I can imagine how lost, incomplete you must be feeling without Marie.
I can imagine it... but I can not grasp it completely.
I think of you all daily and remember Marie.
Keeping you in prayer and sending hugs your way!
i am struggling this week myself. cried and slept all day today. it's ok to be sad, when others rejoice. it's ok shan. i miss you:)
xoxoxo.
LOVE, HUGS AND PRAYERS!!!!!
You don't have to get over it. Not ever. It's something you don't "get over." But it will get easier with time. You're doing awesome.
Shannon I am so sorry ... I wish I knew better words to say. I can only imagine and it is a nightmare. I hope that you are able to enjoy your Thanksgiving with the blessings you have, while mourning the loss of Marie.
HI, I am Clarissa's sister...I am so sorry. I will pray for comfort for your family! Missy
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