Friday, October 15, 2010

Fingerprint Friday...

There is a song by Steven Curtis Chapman that says:
I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God

So look around you and see where YOU can see God's fingerprints. Is it in nature? Kids? Animals? Where do you see them? Here's how to join.

In my life... "Nearly all of God's jewels are crystallized tears"...

Last night I cried myself to sleep.  It's not unusual but it doesn't happen as often as it used to anymore.  I laid down in bed and Luke and I were talking about the devotion we'd just read and I was overcome...  How on earth do we get by without our child daily?  How does life move forward without sweet Marie?  How is it I can smile, laugh, play, do so many things without her?  Once I believe that I could not breath without her in my arms.  I knew certainly I would not be able to live without her, that life would be a barren wasteland without Little Mama.  I have to tell you in complete honesty, without Little Mama here on a daily basis my life has a gaping hole.  But it is not how on earth we get by, it is instead How in Heaven.

As I lay with my head on Luke's chest and sobbed tears for my baby he reminded me that we get by every single day because we have HOPE.  We have the promise God made us and the ransom Jesus paid and we know just where that child is.  Just because I cannot wrap my arms around her doesn't mean she isn't HELD.  She is in the arms of THE ONE who made the sun and stars, who loves her more than I can even begin to understand and I love that little girl with every cell of my being.

I am beginning to come to a place where I embrace the pain.  The sorrow I feel is part of being mother to Marie and I would not trade that for anything.  I would welcome her over and over again even knowing now how badly it would hurt.  The pain I feel is the measure of how much I love her, and how wonderful she is, and what a witness her life was. 

So my fingerprint... it would be the reminder from my Luke... and the blessing that he is in my life.  My fingerprint is the HOPE I cling to every day, that keeps me from loosing it and crying out in despair.  My fingerprint is the FAITH I have gained since Marie was born, the things she taught me, how she changed my life.  My fingerprint is the LOVE I feel that I cannot explain, the peace I have that surpasses all understanding. 

I miss her so much, but because of our Lord I am able to dry my tears and understand that I must just wait (not-so-patiently) and I will get to hold that little girl with golden skin, brown curls, and purple toenails again... I have faith in God that it will happen just as He told me. Acts 27:25

"Flowers live by the tears that fall,
From the sad face of the skies;
And life would have no joys at all,
Were there no watery eyes.

Love the sorrow for the grief will bring
Its own reward in later years;
The rainbow! See how fair a thing
God has built up from tears." Henry S Sutton

This is the song I heard on the way home from taking Josie to school today... be sure to stop the music on the left before you begin the video...



Photobucket

7 comments:

me said...

That Luke sounds like a good guy. Give him a big squeeze.

artsyclay said...

I am glad Luke is there to give you hugs and comfort through this difficult time. ♥

Graceful Moments said...

I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child, but I can imagine the hope, faith and love that gets you through the pain, because they sustain me each day in other of life's challenges. Such a beautiful post and obviously a very beautiful and precious family, in spite of and perhaps in some strange way, because of, your gaping hole. Prayers and blessings lifted up today for you and yours. ♥

clarissa said...

this post brought tears to my eyes, but hope to my heart... i know what you say is true and will be true for us after Abigail is in Heaven as well. our sweet girls have taught us so much and i wouldn't trade the pain for them not ever having been here. i am thankful and blessed to have Abigail and will bare the pain i have seeing her suffer and will have when she has gone Home... and i would do it all over again too. i am blessed by your friendship. praying for you always!

the video doesn't show up for me :(

2awesomekidz said...

Very inspiring and uplifting, Thanks for sharing! Enjoy the beautiful weekend ahead!
Sending all our love!
Tami

Val said...

Loved the song...beautiful. Thanks for your inspiration. I know it hurts and is painful. God is with you...and I am glad you trust in Him.

The VW's said...

Beautiful!!! Hope really is the best gift of all, and it sounds like your husband is a keeper too! Love, Hugs and Prayers!!!