Finally, I remembered the camera!

The back patio with assorted things we removed from the house. Among them: shelves from old hardware store, non-functioning deep freeze, fence posts that used to surround patio, central vac unit.

More of the patio.

The living room view from the dining room. See how my range is actually in the dining room at the moment?

That's because the kitchen looks like this. The stove will eventually be on the left side complete with cabinets which are temporarily removed. This kitchen is huge, I am so excited!

Loading up for the dump.

This is one of the last flowerbeds I have to tackle. It's slightly overgrown. There are strawberries in there, somewhere. I am waiting for a cooler day to tackle this, it was 85 here yesterday!

My girls enjoying the shade. Marie loves being outside, Josie loves exploring that giant flowerbed. Every time she looks there's something new she discovers.

Marie napping yesterday afternoon. As our OT says, she's so cute "you could just roll her in sugar and eat her with a spoon"!

Chinese food, flowerbeds, sleepy heads...

The title is sort of my day in a nutshell. We are going to pick up Chinese and have a picnic with Daddy at the new house. There are times that it amuses me, I am 150 miles from the closest Target but I have Chinese food a few blocks away. In a tiny farm town in NE Colorado. Whatever, that was random.

This morning we were at the new house working on flowerbeds. They have not been tended in at least a few years. I feel a little like a detective, "what is that plant", "who would put that here", "why are there so many f---ing mums?". I didn't say the last one out loud, I try to only curse in my head. It's a lot of work. I'm getting there but honestly don't think I'll be done getting the beds up to speed until next week. That said, I'm a pretty lucky girl that my pressing chores include gardening, filling nail holes in the walls at this house, and touch up painting. My life is simple:)

Marie loves, loves, loves this new routine. The last two days of spending the morning outdoors at the new house, home for lunch, a nap and then going out again in the evening is her cup of tea. She loves being on the go, and she is lovin' this sunshine. She's still napping now, I need to wake her up. Little Mama went down at 1:30 and it's 5:15. That is a healthy nap. I love to see her get some really good, peaceful sleep. I don't know if it's a side effect from the damage to her brain from the Leigh's or what, but sometimes restful sleep is hard for her to come by.

Miss Josie is also loving the warm weather, mostly because I let her wear flip flops to preschool. I know, I am unbelievably cool. We are barefoot people, if we play our cards right Marie, Josie and I may not wear socks again for at least three months. Wouldn't that be fantastic?

This is a little rambling, I'm a little tired and sunburned, sitting here feeling number 3 wiggle around and getting ready to sort of wrap up this day. I hope that everyone has enjoyed this warm stretch as much as we have been! I've got my camera in the car and am going to try very, very hard to snap a few picks of the new house tonight. Luke's been hard at work with his Dad's help, it looks a lot different than it did before already.

The Brave Little Soul

I've posted this before but I love it so much I wanted to share it again.

Brave Little Soul
By: John Alessi

Not too long ago in Heaven there was a little soul who took wonder in observing the world. She especially enjoyed the love she saw there and often expressed this joy with God. One day however the little soul was sad, for on this day she saw suffering in the world.
She approached God and sadly asked, “Why do bad things happen; why is there suffering in the world?” God paused for a moment and replied, "Little soul, do not be sad, for the suffering you see, unlocks the love in people’s hearts.” The little soul was confused.
“What do you mean,” she asked.” God replied, “Have you not noticed the goodness and love that is the offspring of that suffering? Look at how people come together, drop their differences and show their love and compassion for those who suffer. All their other motivations disappear and they become motivated by love alone.” The little soul began to understand and listened attentively as God continued, “The suffering soul unlocks the love in people’s hearts much like the sun and the rain unlock the flower within the seed. I created everyone with endless love in their heart, but unfortunately most people keep it locked up and hardly share it with anyone. They are afraid to let their love shine freely, because they are afraid of being hurt. But a suffering soul unlocks that love. I tell you this - it is the greatest miracle of all. Many souls have bravely chosen to go into the world and suffer - to unlock this love – to create this miracle - for the good of all humanity." Just then the little soul got a wonderful idea and could hardly contain herself. With her wings fluttering, bouncing up and down, the little soul excitedly replied, "I am brave; let me go! I would like to go into the world and suffer so that I can unlock the goodness and love in people’s hearts! I want to create that miracle!" God smiled and said, "You are a brave soul I know, and thus I will grant your request. But even though you are very brave you will not be able to do this alone. I have known since the beginning of time that you would ask for this and so I have carefully selected many souls to care for you on your journey. Those souls will help you create your miracle; however they will also share in your suffering. One of these souls are most special and will care for you, help you and suffer along with you, far beyond the others. She has already chosen a name for you. God and the brave little soul shared a smile, and then embraced. In parting, God said, “Do not forget little soul that I will be with you always. Although you have agreed to bear the pain, you will do so through my strength. And if the time should come when you feel that you have suffered enough, just say the word, think the thought, and you will be healed.” Thus at that moment the brave little soul was born into the world, and through her suffering and God’s strength, she unlocked the goodness and love in people’s hearts. For so many people dropped their differences and came together to show their love. Priorities became properly aligned. People gave from their hearts. Those that were always too busy found time. Many began new spiritual journeys – some regained lost faith – many came back to God. Parents hugged their children tighter. Friends and family grew closer. Old friends got together and new friendships were made. Distant family reunited, and every family spent more time together. Everyone prayed. Peace and love reigned. Lives changed forever. It was good. The world was a better place. The miracle had happened. God was pleased.

In a few words...

Just briefly, what's up with us?

It's sunny, we did sidewalk chalk. Too windy for bubbles though :(

Taco's for dinner, for lack of a better idea.

Thinking of getting a sitter and maybe going on an honest to goodness date this week.

After seeing Marie's occupational therapist on Friday the time has come that I admit we need a tumble form chair. It's a special needs chair that will position her better than the bouncy or high chair for playing and eating. By today I've come to terms with needing it, it will make life better. The only problem is that I don't have a special needs child. I have an awesome child with different obstacles than the norm that we have to overcome.

Going to try for yard work tomorrow... keyword: try.

Going to try to remember camera to take some renovation pics of the new house. Perhaps I should put it in my diaper bag tonight...

We did mommy & girls mani/pedis after preschool this afternoon. Our fingernails are hot pink, my toenails are fire engine red. Josie picked the colors and we have to be matching. Every time I see them I smile.

After the drama last night when Mickey won Clue it will be a long time before we play that game again. Long story short, Josie is a poor looser. But then again, Mickey *might* have cheated.

I'm off to make tacos...mmmmm!

Pictures!

Big girl (her face is priceless).

Daddy's Baby

Putting up with Josie...

Mommy's birthday, and the cake Uncle Mickey brought which resulted in everyone having their mouths stained green ;)

Roughhousing

Josie and Uncle Mickey.

My pretty girls. Marie and I did not attend the Easter service, too many people and she was just getting over being sick, but she dressed up anyway. Their cousin N has the green version of this dress and we hopefully get some pictures of all three girls dressed up soon!

I curled Josie's hair and let her wear a little blush and lip gloss. The end result was her looking like Shirley Temple, or a doll. Either way, I couldn't believe how cute she was. She loves the dress too, if you can't tell!

All ready for church (*swoon* I love Luke in a suit)!

It was mentioned that I haven't posted any belly pics, and honestly I feel a little bad. This is the first real picture I've found of me pregnant this time (Josie and her random playing with the camera). This is me at 22 weeks with number 3. I look a little grumpy, she caught me in the middle of explaining why we must continue to pick up our toys instead of leaving them out to play with again.... I am a "fun hater" she says.

Update

Just a quick update, not much going on here. I have Easter pictures of the girls I'll put up sometime soon. Otherwise we're just doing well. Marie is much, much better! We closed on the house yesterday so we'll have a lot going on for the next little while:)

In this case, no news is good news! I'll blog sometime soon:)


P.S. Do you like my new look? I hate to brag, but I totally figured out how to do this myself... next up, adding pictures to the header... My inner geek is just delighted (who am I kidding, my outer geek is pretty thrilled too)!

Getting better...

Last night went better!

Marie went down about 10 and even though we were up coughing every hour or two she would cough, then hold my hand and go back to sleep!

Seriously, it was awesome! This morning, lots of coughing but after drinking some of Mommy's coffee (shhh) she was good to go. The neb treatments really seem to be helping, the Zyrtec showed results and this was what Luke and I looked like:

Really, at 21 weeks pregnant I still look that hot in a bikini. I know, hate me.

Rie has been smiling, eating some cottage cheese, starbursts (thanks Barb!) and jelly beans. I am crossing my fingers but I think we're kickin' this thing!

Now if we can just keep it up!

In other news, Josie and I are going to dye Easter eggs this evening. It's snowing here again, which is not summer-like at all but it's good moisture so we'll take it! We should close on the new house next Tuesday and Josie has the beginning of a double ear infection. Don't worry, we caught it early so we can treat with decongestants and not put her on antibiotics again!

So, that's it. Hopefully we really are on the downhill side of this bug and things get better from here!

And finally, because it was just to weird to leave out of any "happy dance" montage I leave you with a dancing flamingo!

New plan

Our wonderful hospice nurse came to check Marie this afternoon and we developed a new plan to deal with this incessant cough and the inability to rest that comes with it. We are going to do pediatric Zyrtec and a nebulizer treatment 4 times a day that should help to dry her up. She's not congested and her lungs are clear so we just need to manage this wicked post nasal drip.

I am feeling stronger, I was exhausted and near my breaking point this morning. Firstly, everyone's wonderful words helped a ton, and my bestest best friend Sarah reminded me that there is a world outside my house. Thanks again for the gossip, it made me feel normal again! I wish you lived next door instead of across the state!

So, new plan tonight and I'm feeling hopeful we'll get results. Now I'm off to pull laundry out of the dryer and throw together some tuna melts (nothing but the best here at our house, it's gourmet people!). I'm feeling hope for tonight and worst case scenario I guess at least I have some descent stuff on the DVR to watch.

I am...

I am tired.

I have spent too much time thinking at late hours.

I'm terrified of Marie not getting over this cold. What will I do if she can't bounce back, what if she can't be comfortable anymore? What will I do if we ever reach the time when I can no longer comfort her?

I am emotional.

I am out of patience and not at my nicest. I feel a little sorry for the girl at the insurance company that I had to talk to this morning.

I am waiting for my nails to dry, I gave myself a pedicure. I need to just relax and let go.

I have waited in the darkness to hear God's voice and heard nothing. I know He's there, but I'd like to hear Him answer.

I am enjoying Josie. She is writing get well notes for her Daddy and sister this morning.

I am so grateful that the sun is shining.

I am never giving Marie Tylenol with Codeine again. At times last night she struggled to breath, shivered for no apparent reason, gasped to cough and I could do nothing but be at the foot of the Cross. It was a hard night.

I am hoping I do not get this cold.

I am confused by 5 year old logic. Josie wanted to spell really. "How do you spell it Mama?" "R, E, A, L, L," "I'm ready for the next letter" I said, "Y". "Because MAMA, I am trying to spell a word here".

I need to pick up my girl who's trying to cough again. She won't even smile this morning.

Jesus, if You're listening.... You know what I'm trying to say.

Update on Marie

She slept better last night, from 10 pm to about 4 am. Then she woke up and coughed at least an hour (Luke took her and I went back to bed at 5). I brought her in to the doctor this morning and her lungs are okay, just the pesky cough. We have a prescription cough syrup to try so hopefully tonight will go much better. She just can't stop coughing long enough to get the sleep she needs, though she does seem to slowly be getting better.

If she's still having trouble on Thursday I'll bring her back in. Right now we're just praying this wraps up and she's feeling better. Josie, Marie and their cousin have matching dresses for Easter Sunday service and Luke's family and friends have a get together that day we'd really like to make it to. We'll have to see.

Marie is napping right now so hopefully that helps and like I said, hopefully tonight will be much better!

Brief update...

Last night = Long night.

Rie getting better we think. Fever's gone but cough is driving her crazy. Wears her out, fell asleep in the high chair she was so tired! No appetite. Hospice checked her lungs, clear. Praying this passes soon.

Luke has Rie's cold. Yay for Mommy. Last night was maybe 4 hours of sleep for me. Blegh.

Is summer ever coming?

Asking the Lord for strength, a restful night, and thanking him for Jesus. Good Friday is coming up.

Much love-

Last night

As of now Rie's fever has broken. She's tired, as are all of us, but doing better. She still has the cough but it sounds like it's in her throat/head and not her lungs. No crackly sounds or wheezing.

Last night at about 1 am I checked her temp and it was at 103 underarm, so you add a degree and that's her supposed temp. The highest we've seen Marie run yet. We stripped her down and put her in a lukewarm bath. The stinker actually smiled at us when we put her in, then she realized how cold it was and didn't smile anymore.

Luke and I took turns sleeping in the living room to keep her upright so her coughing wouldn't keep her up. A looong night.

Thank you for the prayers! Hopefully the fever stays gone, or low grade at the very least. We're going to try to get some sleep this afternoon. Not much else to do as it was a blizzard here yesterday and we have 3 foot drifts around the house!

Praise God for answered prayers!

Sick again...

Last night Marie woke up about 2:30 with a fever of over 102. We treated with Tylenol and Motrin and finally got it down to about 100 an hour and a half later. She slept on and off the rest of the night, and this morning the fever was back. Along with it she has a cough that's pretty junky sounding, but in her throat not her lungs. Hospice was here and checked her yesterday and her lungs are clear. We are praying that this is just a cold, Josie had been fighting one for the last week and so far it seems similar.

We ask that you pray this doesn't get more serious, after our scare with pneumonia last month it is scary to see her sick again so soon.

She's been napping most of the afternoon and we're hoping the sleep gives her some strength. The fever is running 100-102 at this point but hasn't broken yet. Because Marie's body struggles to produce enough energy to sustain her running a fever is very hard. She has no reserves to fight or to lower her temperature easily.

We'll keep you posted, and thank you so much to everyone who says a prayer for her. We've seen again and again where God listens.

Info about joining Marie's team for Landon's Hope Walk.

Several people have asked me about the best way to contribute or participate in Landon's Hope. If you would like to join the team or just make a monetary donation you can do one of several tings.

• You can give a check/cash directly to me and I will add you to our team online, you will be able to walk the walk with us, will receive a t-shirt etc.
• You can give a check/cash directly to me and I will make the donation online in your name. You would not be part of the team if you do not wish.
• You can follow this link and go to the website and join the team yourself using your credit card. You can also use this link to make an anonymous donation in honor of Marie or in memory of Landon.
• For those of you who are interested you can also become a corporate sponsor of the event. We are in the process of sponsoring the walk through our farm, S & L Sch... Farms, LLC. If you would like to become a corporate sponsor you can contact Tami and she will walk you through that process. Your company's name will appear on the t-shirts for Landon's Hope. In the column on the right of the Landon's Hope website you will see a link in the Visitors section that is highlighted blue. Click on that and it will direct you to Tami's email address.
• You can also click on the General Donation link in the Visitors section of the column on the left of the Landon's Hope web page. You can make a general donation there for the walk.
  

All proceeds are going directly to UMDF to fund research, raise awareness, and with God's grace someday find a cure for this devastating disease. Plus, the walk is going to be amazing! You can meet us in person, meet my wonderful friend Tami, and it's just a really good cause!

I hope this is helpful and I look forward to seeing you there!